The OLD – NEW – OLD Ingrid!!
Does everybody (who knows me) remember the HAPPY person that I used to be??? Self confident, adventurous, independent, able to solve problems, tough, full of hope, sociable and who most of the times used to know what I wanted from life and how to get it?? Well, that person was almost gone. I went through a very rough time… full of sadness, loneliness, confusion, fear and the most horrible dependence, just a terrible feeling that made me think that I wasn’t able to do anything by myself anymore. I was just feeling absolutely helpless and lost. Then I spent a lot of time trying to find out what did I want and trying to plan my life, but it didn’t work and I started to feel worse. I just couldn’t understand why most of the people that I know can have this long term plan of life and even if at the end they don’t stick to it, at least they have one… finally some days ago I understood that I am just different. I cant work with a long term thing because I get bored very easy and because I prefer to allow my self to make all kind of spontaneous changes, take risks and have a bit more of freedom! For most of the people this could be seen as irresponsibility, but it seems to work for me!! So I’ve decided to go back to the OLD Ingrid, who I personally like more and go back to living my life in a day-by-day basis and I am feeling way better now. I think that a big part of the problem was that I wanted to be like the rest of the people and dream about a family and a house and think more about the future. However, I’m just not at that level yet. I dream about different things and if there is something that I can’t force, those are it. I think “tomorrow” I'll probably be dreaming about all that and making plans about the future and then I’ll be happy doing it and taking all those responsibilities. As of now I just want to go little by little and enjoy my life as much as I can. By making short-term plans and trying to accomplish them and make small sacrifices to get what I want!!
I just wanted to share my feelings with all of U!! Any advice is very welcome…